it's been about a week since school "officially" ended and i'm missing school already :)
i feel as if someone just fast-forwarded my life in vj! dread the end of it. i dread not spending next year in vj donning the beige uniform and ill sorely miss searching for the college pin every morning!

and all the people who have made such a difference in my life, people i dearly love, people who will probably disappear from my life after A's,no matter how many promises we make. i've ended several chapters in my life but this, ending my school-uniform-wearing, scholar-living-in-hostel era will be like ending a volume in HUAYSHAN'S BOOK OF LIFE. raaah.

and not seeing eunice's skinny legs anymore.. not heading off to the malay stall with wanyun anymore.. not running to east coast anymore.. not poking my head into stella's room anymore.. not pretending to jog into school (when i'm late) anymore.. it's intolerable!

i feel like crying lah. the focus of schooling should be fostering stronger and more meaningful ties with the people around you, instead of spending hours trying to sponge-ify your brains. mr ho told us,on a very memorable day, that there're only two things that life really is about:
1)finding meaning in our lives
2)appreciating our loved ones and those around us

but to quote mr harris this time, while we blame the education sytem for stuffing us into this awful awful situation, we ourselves are victims of our own ambitions. 'fess up, we want to do well. even if the whole education system got revamped and we can still lead a good life without the A's nothing would change. you'ld still find muggers locked up in vj at 10pm. sigh. i wish i could get rid of my peculiar desire to do well. my determination to do well, even though i know it doesnt really matter and im abandoning what matters for it. don't you?