what blind fools we were!

i'm leaving msia tonight and going back to bham tomorrow.

i feel really overwhelmed now and i need to tell everyone my story. it's silly how i've been hankering after love in the form of a tall dark handsome HOT guy when in fact, i've been in love all along! with my mama...

it's 2.30pm now and my mom just left for work- she finishes at 1030pm and my flight's at 830 so there's no way she can see me off- and basically it's the last time i'll be seeing her in 6 months. you know me right, have u seen me shed a tear when i was studying in singapore,have you seen me HOMESICK? i think i get singapore-sick more often. anyway, my mama is the kindest, loveliest mother in the world- she spends her free time buying me things i want: this is the huayshan-mama shopping style : take huayshan to nice gorgeous shops and say, buy anything u want, take your time! and then 1 hour later, at the counter mama pays up with a happy smile. i don't just love her cause of that okay im not a gold-digger. my mom listens to me and does everything she can to solve my problems(however silly they can be- once she got damn worried cause i was stressed about doing a presentation in front of the class) basically my problems=her problems.

i was saying bye to my mama in the carpark and i really felt like crying. and towards the end i couldn't help it lah, tiny droplets of tears welled up in my eyes. shiat. then i thought about why i was crying(cause guys, i don't fancy malaysia much) and i realised that i was afraid my mother would feel lonely and sad without me around and the thought of her being lonely and sad made ME sad. so much so i couldn't be bothered about the fun awaiting me at bham. now isn't THAT true love? when you put the happiness of someone before yours? the funny thing is my mom feels the exact same way. it's a vicious cycle- she's sad cause i'm sad and i'm sad cause she's sad. stupid, actually. (:

next time i blog i'll be back. so remember to look for love in other places ya. can be surprisingly overwhelming. if i can find a guy that i love as much as my mama i'ld say my life will be awesome. alright. be calling lots of you tonight. *hug*

huayshan