ho-li-day!

i've been such a slacker, been watching millions of movies and slacking around like cra-zy. annnyway tonight's late night movie night, watching tormented at 9.30pm!!! =) and tmr morning am off to prague! haven't packed yet though but nvm! bad thing is we opted to carry all our luggage onboard so we cant bring shampoo and soap. stupid! haha clara and frances came over yesterday to discuss the trip and they did SO MUCH RESEARCH i felt so bad!!!! i did a teensy bit. it's good travelling with them man. am really looking forward to it cause they're very fuss-free and easy to get along with. am still having friends-fighting-so-i-am-stuck-in-between issues.

rightttt then off to watch another movie before i drag my ass to school to use the printer(we have free printing so i am going to print a hell load of maps to bring to prague heh)

bye! update when i'm back on monday! :)

huay shan

i am a very strange person i think.

i'll explain the shades in a bit.

firstly it's been a hectic after-exam period. i don't have a thousand friends i swear i don't but somehow i seem to be running around a lot to hang out with different people i <3. i think it kiiiinda has to do with the fact that some of my friends are fighting so i have to meet them both separately(long story but it's taking a toll on my health seriously and my sanity) i reallllly wish they would make up but till then.. it's running around time! and lots of guilt too. :(

anyway didn't mean to sound grumpy! today was wake up late day,run in the hot sun while jima cycled beside me squeaking faster faster!, slacked and walk around-ed with shi-mei and then movie+dinner with veronica(points up) we watched coraline.i had no idea it was a 3d movie, when we paid for the tickets the guy handed us both a pair of shades and i was like ....?? haha it was cool. not WOWWW but cool. i want to watch night in the museum 2!

tmr is squash in the morning(i've never played squash before, i'm probably going to embarrass myself) shopping in afternoon, dinner at night. quite looking forward to the shopping bit heh.

about me being strange.. i don't know but after exams, i find myself wanting to be alone, having nothing planned. as in i like going out of course and hanging out with people but somehow a part of me loves being by myself in my room, just being alone and watching shows and eating and chilling. is that weird? and i had a few potentially-fun-clubbing-nights-where-ppl-i-like-being-with-are-going but somehow the idea of pretty-ing up, wandering around darkness and noise and boogying all night makes me feel sleepy. haha i was wondering cause lots of ppl around me like to pack their days with activities. i dont know... well i'm actually a born loner. ha! i remember barricading myself in my house after A's with a whole season of lost and fried rice. good stuff.

rightttts. i love being on the computer and not feeling guilty :)

huayshan!

Busy Bee

It's been a long time since I've been back here.

Anyway, summer's been good so far. Back at contact trainings and starting a new slate with touch, we'll come back stronger. On top of that, people are back so it's time to catch up and re-live the good ol' days (: Parents are back as well, really miss them!

This week's gonna be busy though. So many things to do: pack for trip, attend meetings/briefings/gatherings, train up, settle event matters (fingers crossed).

I really hope I can get everything settled by the end of the week so that I can have a peaceful weekend in Bangkok. Am really lazy to pack though! Hope it'll be fun!

On the bright side, I'll have great company and music this whole week.

Sticks and stones and animal bones
Can't stop me from having
A good day on a bad day

<3

yeee!!

this is for corrine. bet she's enjoying herself looking at food. spent the day today eating and talking nonstop and playing musical chairs(i was 3rd!!) and that stupid game where you and a partner try to stand on the sheet of paper that gets smaller and smaller every round.

anyway my contribution to today's dinner wassss pasta!!! with pesto and yogurt. and it was well-received, *bows*. i love hanging out with these people they cook awesomely well. esp the hongkong girls. AWESOME STUFF. the thai boys didnt come today. i was damn sad cause it meant no thai curry. ha!

FOODDDD....... this corn thing was clara's idea. she poured it on top of fried fish. weird i know but it tasted surprisingly good! one of those gross looking things that taste awesome.

THIS APPLE CAKE WAS GORGEOUS. GORGEOUS I SAY. btw girl on extreme left in pink, frances, is one of the girls im going to prague with.

and these two are my favourite girls! clara(left) and sanah. vanessa that's my clara! :) and sanah hahaha sanah is funny and she's good in musical chairs she was 2nd!! btw this bunch of people are retarded and i really like hanging out with them- the last time we met we played this game where you whisper a word to the person next to you, and you pass it on and on until you reach the last person, then you compare what the last person heard to what the first person actually meant. and from osteomalacia(a medic term that i came up with to complicate things) it became "i live in malaysia!!!" HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH bunch of stupids!! haha stupids i love nonetheless. :p

*peace*.

haha just watched slumdog millionaire today too on bambi. not bad! but not that great. maybe cause everyone's been raving about it. anyway, anyone else thinks jamal is quite cute and the fat policeman is hilarious?

huayshan

tired until cannot tired already.

firstly, i am exhausted.

secondly, am stressed out about housing. longggg story but just know i'll be HAPPY BEYOND WORDS when i finally sign the bloody contract.

so after exams, shimei and i went for lunch, hung out in her room and met erica and sangeeth to go house hunting. ended with dinner and lots of babbling.

camera-shy shimei. silly girl if i were that pretty i'ld be smiling broadly at the camera.
FOOODDDD

MY CURRYYYYYYY

yay my face has slimmed down again!!!! :) anyway lots of plans ahead, exhausting to think about them though.. more pictures soon! tiredddddd. take care everyone! exams are over wheeee!!

huayshan

im sho, sho tyred.

yesterday i had another panic attack(seem to be having plenty of these lately) so i stuffed my brain with theories about sex,aggression and death(and more) until 3am and rolled around in bed worrying about not studying enough till i fell asleep. i... am..... ex... haus-teddd....

today's a-over! fri left. and that's mcq so it's not so bad. and i have 3 days to study for it!!

i'm too exhausted to think about what to do after exams haha am i a geek or what. but priority: GET SLEEP and SLEEP IN. whoo! and prague next friday! or is it thursday. ah clara'll remind me.

time to get me some well-deserved relaxation.

bye!!

huayshan

round two DINGDING!

everything has been going uphill from tuesday(the day i massacred a paper and potentially, my holidays.) my paper yesterday was pretty decent too. not A material but the ok-i-dont-have-to-worry-about-failing feeling. i swear i went crazy on wed and thurs, used my brain the way i've never used it before and yes i feel happy abt yesterday.

*edit*

it was sucha lovely peaceful day, i am really really sad it's over. ended at half 12, went to lunch with shimei and sangeeth, met ppl along the way chatted, then after lunch *beams* shimei drove to sainsburys and we shopped like mad i bought profiteroles, baked beans, an obese jar of pesto, grapes and a whole lot more. spent 20 pounds but i felt so happy!!!! wandering around the supermarket beaming at shimei cause i was too happy.

got back, popped into jima's room and yakked awhile with occasional "smell my feet jima smell them!!"s, inside joke haha and then pria called so i ran over to a uni cafe to meet her over hot chocolate and BANANA DOUGHNUTS which are awesome!! unique and extremely tasty. thennn highlight of me day, came back found vanessa online and yakked for 2 hrs with her v glad we caught up chong chong! was supposed to wait for cherlyn to skype with her too but i was too exhausted so went to zzzz at 12.

:( time to study now. sigh ytd was gorgeously relaxing and peaceful.

huay shan

a 3-minute break.

heya, anyone there? i did pretty good for today's paper. much better, was a sociology paper and after my panic yesterday i went mad and stuffed it all in so i knew how to do most of the paper *beams proudly* so confirm pass.

next paper is on friday. imagine studying 2x chem and 2x bio alevel stuff. thats what ive got to do.. and worst thing is i just realised that i cant skip random notes(cause then ill end up depressed rmb ytd?) so i have BILLIONS.. ok fine maybe 10 sets of notes ive never seen in my life and have to learn by friday. that and the 50.. ok fine 35 sets of notes that i'm vaguely familiar with. o-o. ok breaks over! wish me luck!! looks like im barely going to get any sleep but that's my plan just study like siao and crash on fri aft after the paper! CMON SHAN GO GO GO!

huayshan

truelove(:

i'm positive i failed this paper and that i'll have to cut my holiday short to take resits. but here's what my mother sent to me:

mama love shan shan no matter what :)

and it just reminds me of the things in life that are more important than exam results. i'm 2o but i'm still a mummy's girl. and i'm loving every single moment of it.

huay shan

p/s i really will fail one paper. i just thought abt it and yeah.. 90% fail. how do i tell my dad? sigh.. wish i could weep to sleep but i gotta study for tmr.

i want to go back to the old days.

i was just looking through my old posts and ohmygoodness so many memories came back to me! lovely ones. this blog is precious to me i seriously want to have this blog with me for the rest of my life. not that i'm going to be blogging till i'm 80(or if i do how cool will that be!) but i dont know.. our blog has become more than a place to type stuff in when i'm bored, it's more like a diary! yea i know a blog is an online diary but how many people really record everything that happens to them? i do! check out my emo kayak posts. thousands of them. it's like when i read some posts, i'm reminded of things i would never have remembered. lovely things. so i'm going to make myself blog more often(sorry if that's a bad thing heh) cause it's great looking back at my life remembering the lovely lovely things i've done and that i've gone through :)

that said.. liesel and elise have some weird notion about me reminding them of a hyperactive girl who's being stalked by an ah-kua and who's in love with a constipated guy. ya meh???? hahahha but oh man it reminded me of lovely lovely vj... mmm.. lovely lovely vj. time to think abt vj to sleep.

nights!

huay shan

Mish Mash

The week has been full of ups and downs.

Firstly, the parents left for a 2 week cruise around Europe, leaving me with my grandma at home. I must say I really miss them already and 2 weeks seems like a really long time without them. Sure, I do get freedom but it's not much different from when they were around. Weekends just seem kinda dull without them and the house seems really empty and quiet, it scares me. I just hope 2 weeks fly by quickly!

Today was really disappointing for me. I feel that I'm really weak mentally and I just wish I were stronger, less hesitant and braver in many ways. I guess this is a true test. I have to pick myself up and go forward again. I need to regain my focus and strength. I just hope this week is enough to keep me going for that last stretch. I wanna show improvement. I wanna do better. I don't wanna let myself down any longer. I just hope I can pull through...

Other than that, things have been going well. I've been pretty happy the whole week. I'm really glad things are going well (: It's been such a joy! I had meet ups and spent time with loved ones. What a great way to spend the holidays! I got to see the Chinese Gardens and really just laze at home. I like this kinda holidays. Looking forward to meet ups and more great times to come this week! (:

I guess it's times like these that I really am grateful for the wonderful friends around me, who make things so much better and the care and concern is just heartwarming. <3

xoxo,
MAR

hah-low..

exams start next tuesday! end the friday after.

everyone should jog everyday.can't believe i gave it up when i came here. it's so therapeutic!!! makes me feel good when i eat and makes me feel happy and free and powerful and free free free FREE!!! i know i have bad taste in songs but michelle branch's breathe and you get me seriously make me so happy and smiley when i'm running and scaring ducks. *side note: english ducks are bold and unafraid of humans, which pisses me off. was running and this obese duck was in my way and it obviously expected me to run around it so i heh, ran straight into it and it kinda looked alarmed and waddled backwards looking panicky heeheeheehee* i know it started out with me wanting to lose weight but heheehe running is therapeutic! :) 6 days and counting!

time to pick up my laundry from the dryer though i bet my clothes will still be soaked. gah. byee!

huayshan

sinking slowly into depresssssioonnn........

so.

i know i've been sending out depressing emails and msges to a lot of people heh heh.. sorry bout that. truth is.. i'm still doing shit. but small things make me feel better.

why was i feeling shit? cant sleep, mom says me fat, getting highly annoyed at my flatmate, stressed. i missed home very much then.

why feeling better? :)

i'm going to prague for 5 days after the exams!! it's just lovely that it's AFTER EXAMS and i'm going with clara and frances, two other hk girls. dont tell me its dangerous i dont care. i've been so stressed cause we started out with a bigger grp but some ppl had visa problems blabla and so i was so afraid it wasn't going to materialise after all but one day clara and i just decided YES WE WILL GO NO MATTER WHO GOES and we dragged frances and yes!! :) they're lovely ppl and i really am mighty excited.

i love clara. i get annoyed at my flatmate sometimes to the point of me being THIS close to throwing baked potatoes at her but clara is lovely and we're always in the lib together and it's such a comfort to know she's somewhere behind me and that i have a nice walk back with her to look forward to. clara and jima are coming to singapore in aug. if we go mambo when they're here i'll drag them and you guys can meet them! if it's ok that is, not sure if it'll be awkward?

EBF is lovely. she's the other person here that's keeping me sane. she's busy with her life but always there for me. makes me feel so affectionately towards her i would really do a lot for my dear dear EBF =)

i get really scared sometimes when i feel like i don't really have trueblue close friends here so i console myself knowing that i have lovely ppl back home- but i'm just really really scared that one day, 5 years later, ill come home and realise that i've grown apart from the ppl back home. then i'll be in some limbo stuck in between both worlds. please keep loving me!!!!! PLEASE!!! but its been one year and i think we're still going strong dont u?

off to dinner, then more work. missing everyone.

p/s i just skyped with my bro cause elise's bro is in london and i missed mine AND I WANT TO SAY IM SO PROUD AND PLEASED cause he's now disciplined and exercising and eating healthily and has lost lots of weight!! that's the YUEN spirit for you! then i skyped with my mom after and she was like, yea one child shrinks, one expands WTH!!! hahaha time for this yuen to lose weight too! off to runnn BROOMBRROM. im gonna look skinny in my prague pictures!

huayshan